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Rant 752: Republicans Lose Their Minds...What Else Is New?

8/6/2023

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​The third time’s a charm, but not so much if you are (1) a Groveling Old Party’s presidential hopeful, (2) a Capitol Hill clown, or (3) a Fox News propagandist.
 
Donald Trump’s third indictment generated the by now expected feverish overreaction by all three of these representatives of the neo-fascist wing of the American Right. It is telling that none of these three gaggles of grandiloquent gadflies bothered to offer an actual defense of any of the now 78 counts of wrongdoing the totally discredited 45th and hands-down worst-ever president is going to have to answer to at trial. There are two reasons for this: (1) there is no legitimate defense (except insanity) to the overwhelming and detailed evidence outlined in the indictments; and (2) asserting any defense would be an admission that there might be a criminal there there and risk any hope of political or media survival in the face of millions of Trump cultists whose delusions about the Orange Menace must be respected.
 
The Haleys, Scotts, Ramaswamys, DeSanti et al. fell all over one another in their haste to scramble to Trump’s side and proclaim that the pursuit of accountability for the party’s  frontrunner is but a nefarious political witch hunt by a weaponized Justice Department intent on neutering the formerly randy Republican. “Unfair!” “Double standard!” “What about Hunter Biden?” yelped the amoebae as they flagellated wildly, hoping against hope that a demonstration of blind fealty to the MAGA base delusions would somehow launch them out of the depths of Brownian ooze to percolate up in the polls (against overwhelming evidence to the contrary). This strategy is a mighty strange way to behave toward the guy they need to stomp in order to prevail in the primaries. No matter. They were history even before they threw their headgear into the circus ring. Their best hope at this point is either a Vice Presidential anointing or an obscure cabinet post such as Secretary of Utter Chaos or Director of Government Retribution in the Second Coming.
 
Republican House members have added a new dimension to America’s mental health crisis. This time they distinguished themselves in three wackadoodle ways: (1) reacting to Trump’s third indictment as one would expect: hysterical fuming about a two-tier justice system and how unfair it is to persecute America’s premier persecutor; (2) comparing Trump’s legal woes to those of Hunter Biden, which is akin to equating the known universe with a speck of sand; and (3) going completely bonkers with utterly preposterous hearings ranging from farcical attempts to prove that Joe Biden is an arch-criminal to taking seriously the idle ravings of a crazed witness who claims that the Biden administration is covering up the existence of the bodies of alien pilots at Roswell, NM and Area 51. Watching the hugely hapless committee chairs, James Comer (of the Kentucky Homer Simpsons) and Jim (“Gym”) Jordan, Ohio’s answer to Mulder and Scully, one could only either collapse into uproarious laughter, manifest shame before the shade of James Madison, or keep repeating the mantra, “you cannot make this stuff up.”
 
And then there was Fox News’ collection of GOP Goebbels clones. They gave new meaning to the term “strident” with their hare-brained conspiracy theories and propagandistic shrieks about the injustice of it all. As always, they could not tear themselves away from Nazi allusions that are completely out-of-touch and out-of-place given the current circumstances.
 
Oh, and I should also mention Ron DeSantis’s additional contribution to the Western canon. If elected (good luck with that), he wants to appoint the seriously unbalanced Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. head of either the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or the Food and Drug Administration. Ta ta American healthcare.
 
Rest assured, as the Republicans dig deeper into the political netherworld, it will get even zanier. Guaranteed.
 
Time to take a deep breath and fantasize about the Deep State.
 
Dick Hermann
August 6, 2023

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    Richard Hermann is the author of thirteen books, including Encounters: Ten Appointments with History and, most recently, Mother's Century: A Survivor, Her People and Her Times. Soon to be released is his upcoming Close Encounters with the Cold War, a personal reflection on growing up in the nuclear age. He is a former law professor and entrepreneur, and the founder and president of Federal Reports, Inc., a legal information and consulting firm that was sold in 2007. He has degrees from Yale University, the New School University, Cornell Law School and the U.S. Army Judge Advocate General’s School. He lives with his wife, Anne, and extraordinary dog, Barkley, in Arlington, Virginia and Canandaigua, New York.

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